Miss Manners Advice

Mother-in-law from hell branded 'Miss Fancy Pants'

When Miss Withers, a PA at a London recruitment firm, forwarded the email to a small circle of friends for their advice, it was quickly circulated on the internet to thousands of others.

Last night her father, Alan, 64, insisted he had not taken offence over the email but added that he would politely decline an invitation to Sunday lunch were it to be offered.

“Miss Fancy Pants, we call her,” he said.

“I think she has got her eye on the Queen’s job.”

Mr Withers, of Ledbury, Herefordshire,told how he met his future son-in-law’s parents only once over dinner at a pub in south London last year.

Mrs Bourne spoke at length about her horses and her schooldays at Malvern St James girls’ school, Worcs, he said.

“All this woman kept on about was that she had got horses and that made her part of the royalty pack,” he said

“I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, she really is something else.”

Describing Freddie’s father Edward as affable and pleasant, he went on: “My humble opinion of this Carolyn is that she is so far up her own backside she really doesn’t know whether to speak or fart.”

He added: “She’s probably a very nice woman but she doesn’t come across that way – maybe it’s the hormones.”

Mr Withers disclosed that he and his wife Sylvia had been unable to pay for most of the cost of the wedding after they were both made redundant from the nursing agency they ran together in January.

“We are not destitute but at the time money was hard to come by,” he said.

”I don’t think she realised what the background was to us not being able to contribute a great deal.”

He added that the impact of the email – which was sent just as the young couple completed on the sale of heir first home together – had been devastating to his daughter.

“She was so excited with the wedding coming up and moving into their new home, it knocked the stuffing out of her a bit,” her said.

Freddie Bourne, whose family once owned a London department store, studied Philosophyat St Andrew’s where he understood to have moved in the same circles as Prince William and was well acquainted with the Duchess of Cambridge.

He met his future wife after moving to London where he set up his own company selling Dutch bicycles online.

Miss Manners dishes advice on surviving school with class

If someone is talking to you and you pick up a cellular device, you are rude. Whoever it is can wait, like, four seconds until you finish the live conversation before you. Even better, talk to someone in person! Why would you want to tap keys and stare at a screen rather than stare into a hot date's eyes? And if a guy or girl takes out a phone while on the date, the other one reserves the right to leave at once. Obviously, teens today are so bright that at least one world revolves around them at all times. While you're in your own solar system, though, watch where you walk. In the halls, on the street, wherever - it's common courtesy to not let your bubble impede others' travels. When you abruptly stop in the stairwells to talk to someone, you are rude. A repeat offender may dawdle on the stairs and proceed into a more spacious area, walk five steps, then suddenly stop and yell, "Yo dude!!" He may not realize it, but there are usually people behind him. These people can come close to smacking into him, accidentally or on purpose. Do your peers a favor and keep moving.

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